FEAR NOT

Fear.  What is it?  What causes it?  Why do we suffer with it?  Fear happens when a lack of Faith occurs.  Picture in your mind's eye an incredible amount of water /some type of lake: heavy, full of pressure, deep, and dark.  Now picture a wall that dams the water, hold back the water, and a wall that stops the heavy, pressure, deep and dark water from spilling onto the town below.

What is the wall made of?  It is made of the strongest material possible.  The wall is fortified with steel, concrete, re bar and so forth.  The wall holds back all the pressure, the deep, and dark water.  Together the water pushes on the wall and the wall pushes back on the water.  Everything holds, and the town remains safe.
However like all things in life, there is a weakness.  If the water in the story represents the dark, deep doubt and despair that can sometimes penetrate our thoughts and hearts and fill us with negativity, then the wall in the story that is fortified with steel, concrete, and re bar is our faith.  Faith is the strength that instantly holds back the doubt, but we however must trust that the wall will hold.  WE need to exercise the faith to see the wall dam the doubt and help us to stay safe.  We need to be strong.  We need to feel it and trust that the wall will hold.
If I have bad things that happen in any aspects in my life, I first feel the immediate EMOTION of the moment--whether it is an emotion of anger, fear, stupidity, or sadness.  I allow myself the emotional roller coaster to happen (although the emotional wave may not happen until after the immediate crisis, I allow it time to happen so that I can stay sane...after all I am a woman--we are kind of built like this).  Second, I then look at the parts of what caused this: was it sin, was it distraction (being so busy that I didn't see it coming), was it in my control, or was it out of my control?  Following these questions and looking into my heart and getting the honest answer then I do my best to proceed forward with the answers.  Some answers hurt, some are easy, some are financially costly, and some take time...because they are dependent on the mercy of another to forgive you.

I personally feel that when we have to wait on the merits and mercy, and forgiveness of another, it is the time that Satan fills my heart with doubt and misery the most.  It is tough to not get sucked in  and drown in the dark, deep, water of doubt.  It is very difficult to cling to faith when you have to wait.  I have discovered through these moments that I am not able to pull myself out of the water.  It usually takes someone else to throw me that life line of faith and help me to rebuild the powerfull wall of faith in order to hold back the waves of doubt. 

I've been pondering on these things for a while and this morning they came clear.  Nothing earth shattering, but very clarifying.