General Conference...it is a time that I look forward to twice a year. Why? Because it is a time of year that I am taught by Prophets of God. I am chastened (ouch and time for some repenting), I reflect on how things are going, I enjoy the beautiful music, and I am personally touched by a message. It is as if all the prayers, writing, pondering, preparing, and more prayers that the speakers offer up connect to what I've been worried about, or what I've been trying to find an answer to.
It is a simple testimony that I know that my Heavenly Father is listening to what my worries are, what my needs are, and ways that I can grow and improve because he inspires a speaker to say just what they did...and it penetrated my heart. I can number off some of the quick items that I remember and that touched me, but it goes beyond that.
In about 2-3 days I will download the entire conference sessions and listen to them while I go on my "Walk and Talks" early morning walk for the next 6 months. I will feel stirred, moved, and reminded of what I need to "be" (character development) and do (sometimes a check off list). There are moments where there will be one talk that will ring true for me for weeks and months and then suddenly I'll hit the random button and there will be a talk that will feel like I've never heard of it before and I will be shocked, stunned, and amazed to learn more than I thought I was already learning. When these moments happen, I'm always surprised by how "proud" my heart had become and how instantly humbled I am. I think after going over and over the talks that I think, "oh yeah that is the one about such and such so I don't really need that" (A little prideful). Then I'll suddenly really listen to it...feel it (be humbled by it) and start to learn what I need again and again.
I think I can liken this process to reading the scriptures...I know 1st Nephi really, ahem, really well, but no matter, I need to read it again as I go through my study. Who am I to say "been there done that" when it comes to reading scriptures, or hearing a lesson about tithing or what ever I think I might feel "that I know it all...ahem" Dumb right? Because you and I all know that as soon as you say that, you are given an opportunity to learn the lesson again, but this time with a different perspective. When I really think about it, it is or they are, the "Tender Mercies of the Lord" giving me answers, thoughts, and things to ponder about so that I can continue on that path towards the Savior.
I think the talk that spoke to me the most right today was that of "to Be not just to Do". Character development, perfecting, and rewriting is painful, fun, and scary all rolled up into one and the speaker is right. "It is not on a check off list". It is important to keep improving that for that is what we are allowed to take with us as we part from this life. It gives me hope...there is always a new day that has no mistakes in it and based on my choices can become a day filled with learning and growth. Sometimes that growth is painful and scary, but when you pass through that part you realize how far you have come through the gift and power and grace of God...I just love and am soooooo grateful for the Atonement. I know that when I partake of its power that my life is better for it. Again, many of these things are simple...not easy...but in the end character is improved and that is the "be" that I'm searching for.
WEll, anyway, that is my conference recap on things. I can't wait to five into the talks over and over for the next 6 months. Let the learning begin...it is exciting. Happy Conference everyone. :)
1 comment:
Hi Cuz - thanks for checking in! How are you doing? can't wait to see you one of these days.
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